Her and My Desire
by Mr.GrayHoody
Summary: With the start of a new school year, Hikigaya's life is about to become a bit more interesting.
1. Chapter 1

Ever since season two of Oregairu came out, I've been wanting to write a Hikki/Isshiki fic. It's just my opinion, but I feel that these two have the best dynamic of any characters in the whole anime/novel. Too bad she was introduced so late in the series.

As a warning, I don't feel too comfortable writing in this style, but I gave it my best shot.

And of course, I don't own 'Yahari Ore no Seishun Love Comedy wa Machigatteiru'.

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School... What is it? It's supposed to be an institution which teaches the young people of society how to interact with one another, and the general knowledge they may need once they reach adulthood. In reality, that is far from the case.

School snatches children away from a world full of natures mystery. In truth, it is a method of discipline which refuses to take into account the individual. A factory, molding each 'individual' into a uniform group. It follows an imaginary line of what is normal or average. However, life's line is not a straight one, as it prefers to play see-saw on the 'average'.

Lucky for me, my third and final year of high school has just begun. Too bad the break between school years was so short; one week just doesn't cut it. Sometimes, I wish we would follow the American example, and have a nice two month break before we advance to the next grade.

Yuigahama was once again in my class, along with Hayama's whole crew; I guess this will be another interesting year. With class about to end for the day, I notice Yuigahama staring at me. As I make eye contact, she averts her gaze in a flash. Do I have something on my back?

After a few more minutes, the Sensei releases us for the day.

Just before I could make my escape, though, Yuigahama calls to me.

"Hikki, are you going to the club?"

Seeing the hopeful expression on her face made me mentally sigh a bit. I was hoping to just go home and enjoy my afternoons this year. Plus, I never received a notice that the club would be starting up again. Mulling it over for a moment, I make my decision. "Yeah, I'll be there."

Lets just hope its the right one.

Grabbing my things and heading for the club room, I can't help but wonder whether Yukinoshita will still be upset.

After the whole Valentines day incident, the three of us were a bit tense around each other. We started to reach a state of normalcy towards the end of the school year, but who knows if that is still the case.

On Valentines day, I had received way more chocolate than I would have ever imagined. All of them courtesy, of course. But still, I wasn't expecting it. I knew I'd be getting some from Komachi. I also figured Yuigahama and Yukinoshita were going to give me some, which they did. Although, they both appeared a bit tentative when they gave it to me.

I also got some from Ebina, which I wasn't expecting, but I can't say I was surprised either. Kawasaki gave me some, but she was a solid mix of tentative and angry when she gave them to me. Saying something about it being thanks for helping her sister.

I also somewhat expected Isshiki to give me some, as she had mentioned it in the club room. Though, I couldn't tell if she was just being cutesy or not at the time. When she gave them to me, it almost seemed like she was in a rush.

Then there was Orimoto. She's the one who caused a divide among my club. When she gave them to me, Yigahama, Yukinoshita, and Isshiki were all nearby. I don't know why, but after receiving the chocolates from her, the other three seemed to be a bit cold towards me for awhile.

Realizing that I'd been standing in front of the door for some time now, I slide the door open and walk in.

"Senpai... You shouldn't be late on the first day," Whined Isshiki as she plopped her head back on the table.

As I sat down and took out my book, I replied, "I wasn't even sure if there would be club today, so don't blame me."

Wait... Isshiki? What the hell is she doing here? Considering it's the first day of the school year, she should be working with the Student Council.

"Oi, shouldn't you be doing your Presidential duties right now?"

Isshiki sighed, propping her chin on her crossed arms. "I don't feel like it right now. I'll go a little later."

Deciding not to ask anything further, at the risk of me getting annoyed, I start reading my book while trying my best to pay attention to the other's conversation. I did notice, though, that Isshiki seemed to be a little on edge the whole time.

Other than that, we seemed to be back to normal. That's good, I suppose.

..

...

..

After putting on my street shoes, I began making my way home. Just as I was about to leave the school grounds, I heard my junior's voice, "Senpai, why are you leaving so fast?" she asked as she caught up to me.

"What are you talking about? Clubs over, so I'm going home," I replied as if it were the obvious answer.

With a slight droop in her features, she sighed, "That meeting was super boring..."

"Oh? Maybe you should try doing Student Council stuff for once," I suggested without thinking about it.

Adopting an offended tone, she scolded me,"Hey, we do Student Council stuff. Remember the Christmas event? Or the chocolate making..." she asked, but that last part seemed to have stopped her on the spot. I bet she just doesn't want to remember all the tension Valentines day caused.

"I'm not talking about that stuff. You were asked to do those events. I'm saying you should be proactive and come up with things to do on your own."

"Oh! It's strange to hear you talk about doing things you're not required to, senpai."

"Hah, I'm not the one who'd be doing it, though. Besides, if your bored, do something to pass the time."

"Maybe I will," she said in a quiet tone while glancing at me. Oi, if I were the one doing that, you'd be calling me a creep right about now. How's that fair?

"Anyway, senpai, why didn't you email me over the break?" she asked in her cutesy tone. Although, she still seemed to be a bit on edge.

"I wasn't aware that I was supposed to."

With a pout, she continued, "Well you should have. I was super bored the whole time."

"Huh? What does that have to do with me?"

For real, Isshiki, you need to be more conscious of what comes out of that mouth of yours.

"Well, who else am I gonna hang out with?" she asked in what appeared to be a serious way. I need to be careful with her, though. It's sometimes hard to tell when she's being real or fake.

"Your friends, maybe?"

"I only have a few good friends in my year, but they were all busy."

No good, huh? "How about Yuigahama? I'm sure she'd hang out with you."

"She was busy, too."

"Hayama, then? That would have been a perfect opportunity for you."

"Fine. I'll just email you next time," she said in an upset tone. Ignored _and_ now she's mad at me. Awesome.

We didn't say much for the rest of our walk to the station. It was fine with me, but it seemed like she felt awkward from then on. Not that I know why, but that's just what it looked like.

As Isshiki's train pulled up to the station, she got on and turned around. "Bye bye, senpai," she said with a very uncharacteristic expression and a wave. It was almost as if she had a mix of anger, sadness, and happiness going on all at once.

I waved back, then waited for my train to arrive.

The next two weeks went by without much incident. Little did I know at the time, but the next few days were going to be interesting. More interesting than I would have ever thought.

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Well, there's the first chapter. I'm not all that impressed with it myself. The next chapter was the original first chapter, but I realized there were a few discrepancies in it unless I had something come before it.

Also, like I said at the beginning, I've never written like this before. I find it rather hard to write this way, but it's the closest I could get to how Hikigaya thinks. But again, sorry if it seems too inconsistent with the LN's or anime. Sorry it was so short, but I'm still trying to get back into my writing groove.

Reviews are always appreciated, good or bad.

-MGH


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews. I'm still having some problems with my negative, pessimistic writing, so bear with me. I've been reading through the LN's, so hopefully the next chapters will be more accurate to what 8man would be thinking (this chapter was already written when I posted the first chapter, so I didn't change a whole lot in it).

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Volunteering. They say it's a way to give back to the community. Give what back? What has the community ever done for me? In truth, it's just a ploy to get people to donate their time without being compensated. Some people say all the compensation they need is the knowledge that they've helped in some way.

I don't need something so self-satisfying.

Regardless of my opinion, though, the school made it mandatory that every student select a volunteering event. By the end of tomorrow's school day, we had to submit our choice. The very next day, we were all going somewhere to offer our 'gratitude' to the community. No doubt Hiratsuka-sensei's doing.

We could choose one of five events: cleaning, helping at a day care, a center for seniors, an animal shelter, or planting flowers. I, of course, chose the option most suited to my loner tastes.

Finding myself at the threshold of the service club, I open the door, beginning the end of my school day.

"Senpai..." Isshiki whined, "You're late again."

Ignoring her for a moment out of irritation, I sit down, pulling out a new book from my bag. "I was busy. Anyways, I still don't understand why you keep coming here if you don't intend to join." Don't you have more important things to be doing? Like being the student council president, for example.

"Do you have a problem with it?" she asked with a pout.

"No. That doesn't mean I understand, though."

"Senpai, have you decided on what group you want to go with?" she questioned, a bright expression now on her face. "I'm still trying to decide."

Don't change your mood so fast, woman. Not that it matters to you, but, "Yeah, I have."

After a few moments of silence, I looked up from my book. I should be used to these three staring at me by now, but it's still uncomfortable. "What?"

"Don't just leave it at that, Hikki. What group are you going with?"

Why do I need to tell them? On second thought, if I don't, they'll just keep bothering me about it. Well, at least Isshiki will. I've come to the conclusion that she can be unrelenting when she wants to know something. That would be even more annoying. "The group that's going to the river and planting flowers."

Hearing the three chuckle a bit, my frustration levels were on the rise, "What's so funny?"

Yukinoshita was the first to reply, "With your rotten personality, I didn't take you for the flower liking kind of person."

"Yeah, Hikki. It's kind of creepy."

Of course it is. Everything I do is creepy after all. Expecting something to come out of Isshiki's mouth, I turned to her. However, I was surprised when I saw a slight smile playing her lips.

"What are you grinning about?" I asked in irritation. She's starting to come up with some kind of scheme, isn't she? Isn't she?!

"Nothing."

Wait, that's it? No sly remarks? No poking fun at me? What the hell are you planning over there?

After a few more minutes of useless banter, Isshiki left the club room, saying she had something 'super' important to do.

From then on, there was a marked difference in the volume levels of the club room. I guess I was in luck considering how peaceful the rest of my club time was.

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After leaving the club room, I walked to my locker to change into my street shoes. Making my way out of the school building, I hear the telltale tapping of a certain kohai's footsteps.

"Senpai! Wait up."

Why are you out of breath? Your locker can't be that far away, right? You need to work on your cardio, Isshiki.

Without saying anything, I just looked at her. Anticipating nothing, preparing for anything.

"Guess what group I'm going with?"

Huh? You came all the way over here just to tell me that? Besides, I always knew what group you'd choose.

"Whatever group Hayama's in."

I won't lie to myself. I was a bit surprised when her smile seemed to droop a bit. "Well, you're not wrong, I guess."

Oi! What's with the sudden disappointed tone? If you didn't want an obvious answer, don't ask an obvious question.

"Anyway, you know senpai, I can see right through you," she said with a cheeky grin.

There it is again... When are you gonna stop changing moods at the drop of a hat?

"What are you talking about?"

"You're thinking that if you go with that group, you won't have to interact with people as much, right?"

"Well, I-"

"I won't let you," Isshiki said with her cheeky grin turning into a sly one. I was right! She is scheming something.

"Heh, looks like I can see right through you, too."

With a tilt of her head and a questioning look, all that came out was a simple, "Hmm?" Don't do that, it makes you look sort of cute.

"I predicted that you were scheming something, and it seems like I was right." I won't let you play your games this time. I've upgraded my Isshiki defense skill, after all.

Expecting to feel a mild sense of victory, I felt surprised once again. Instead of blurting out some innocent reply, she didn't say anything. She just stood there with another disappointed expression on her face.

"Anyway, I've got to get going. Komachi will be waiting." In truth, that's a bullshit lie. I just didn't want to be in this environment anymore. Sorry Isshiki.

"Fine," she muttered. In a rather upset tone, I might add. Isshiki, you need to choose one or the other. I don't want to be associated with someone whose so indecisive.

As I watched her walk away, I decided I didn't want any more trouble today. So, instead of opening a potential black hole by going to her, I started walking in the direction of my home.

Why, then, did I find myself standing in front of a woman's clothing store?

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..

Leaving the store, along with a small shopping bag (and some piercing stares), I start making my way home. For real this time.

Once there, I open the door and step in. "I'm home," I announce.

"Onii-chan, where have you been? Komachi's been sooo worried!"

I have a clear image of what she looks like right now. Her head tilted, wiping her eyes while pretending to cry. "Baka," I mumble.

Then it hit me. I was still holding the cutesy looking shopping bag. Tossing it behind the drawer next to me, I start hoping that Komachi doesn't see it. I don't have any desire to answer the questions that were sure to come.

"I stopped by a store on my way," I replied just as she came into view. Haaah, that was a close one.

"Woah! Did you buy me something?" she asked in excitement. Too bad I have to destroy your hopes.

"Nope."

"Boo... Onii-chan's a meanie," she whined. I was just glad she didn't ask me anything further.

"Whatever," I said, making my way to the kitchen.

"Ah, dinner will be ready in about an hour," she said, getting back to her cooking preparations.

"Sounds good. I'll be in my room until then."

"Okay, Onii-useles-chan." Was Yukinoshita rubbing off on her?

"That hurts," I say, starting to head up to my fortress. Not before grabbing Pandora's Box in a bag, of course.

Sitting cross legged on my bed, staring at the bag, I begin to question my mental health. I knew the reason I bought it, I just couldn't figure out _why_ I bought it. Not for the life of me.

I let out a long sigh. The volunteering event was scheduled for this coming Saturday, April 15th. This weekend is going to be exhausting. That's for sure.

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So, there it is. I'd like to make this a pretty good length story. I feel bad for my other stories (which I haven't updated in a looong time), but I didn't have the motivation for a while. I'm hoping I can finish this story up, and maybe one or two of the others.

The next chapter will be one to three weeks away. The only reason these two were posted so close was because both were already written when I posted chapter 1.

Anyway, reviews are certainly appreciated, good or bad.

-MGN


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